It’s that time again.
Not any specific date by any means, just a moment where I get sick of looking at certain pictures and I go through a destruction phase where I lose at least one painting to my ennui… and out of those, rarely- there is one that does not come back better than before. This is not a common occurrence, but once in awhile there’s that one piece I just can’t seem to finish, or even get to a place I think I can manage it. Maybe it was too controlled, too forced. Art [fashion/comedy] are all things I appreciate when they feel completely effortless. A creation that feels smooth is often one I can work on for a couple weeks straight without any long stretches of inactivity… although this time can work both ways. My usual process is pretty fast unless it is a large scale picture, which for me is anything over 3×3 ft. Some of what I consider my best work has been the result of this purging process, which no one even realizes because the original didn’t live around to make a name for itself. Or I never liked it enough to publicize it. I do usually leave traces of the original in the final version, it’s part of the conceptual statement I make as an artist, as well as the physical process I want to peek through and lastly: life views [!?] … We got here as a result of the past events, how that’s defined now is up to us.
One of the early ink pieces I attempted. I had so many colors to play with that they pretty much got away from me. I practiced blending and mixing right there on the canvas and didn’t really like the result. It was over pretty quickly one day when I realized I could either stare at the mess another day or give it another shot by simply painting over and erasing the memory. So glad I allowed myself to “throw away” this original. It set me on the path to finding my distinct style and creating everything else that wouldn’t have been possible had I been afraid of “wasting” materials.
The original of this one was done in a different state of mind: anger. Don’t remember the details but I felt like throwing paint on a canvas. The lines seem too stark and kind of frenetic/frantic. The new version is now one of my favorites. I was tired of looking at something that reminded me mainly of a not-so-nice time, so when I had the urge to burn some paint (burning… as in wasting) I threw some paint once again to this canvas and turned it into something I enjoy looking at.
Here is an [old 2009] example of a drawing that greatly improved after I painted over it– Another ink creation, messing around with trippy color combos. Only a day or two of staring at it, and I could see myself taking it further. At my first art show, a man told me that this plus a few other of my pieces scared him. I’m not exactly sure why, but they seemed to “get it” after reading the title of this piece was Pele 2. Yeah. I still hate this one.
Some pieces are SO old [2002?!] that they are not even worth the canvas they are painted on… so they get recycled and repurposed into new mini canvases! It’s a useful exercise to paint on different shapes and sizes, and even random materials. I stretched these circular canvases a long time ago and just now used 5 of them to make a little piece of name decor for my niece Monet! We’ll see what becomes of the rest…
PS– If there is a piece that you want/don’t want me to destroy, please message me or comment below